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Rainbows and shadows intertwine,
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Name: Cindy Tan
Age: 21
University: HELP University College
Birthday: 3rd February 1985

+++ Involved in mission trips!!
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+++ Transferring to U.S.A in 1 year time!!

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Monday, July 18, 2005

Continue....

Sorry people...let me continue what happened that night.... i managed to log on to the ADP's website and what i found was the updated academic calendar! my eyes popped out o_O! I got choked in the midst of drinking my water! Guess what... To my surprise, there is no break throughout the semester.... 11 lectures week straight without break... I was like ..... Aww...how can we students study in such a tight schedule.... remember what i'm planning to take in long semesters... i have planned to take up 5 subjects but now, it seems i have to either move college or take 4 subjects.. but it still seem impossible for me to handle... OOpsss.... here i go again with all the negative thoughts now... my previous post take up my positive thoughts and now, here i come again with the negative ones... wat-lah!!! So negative of me!!!
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Anyway, let me voiced out something....

Being 20, going on 21... it's my 1st time in my life trying out the contact lens!

Well, i don't think I ever had the opportunity to wear contact lens and after wearing it, I found myself being so matured.

In my opinion, I think I'm old enough to have the things I want but not beyond the limits that I have. Grandma always don't allow me to have contact lens and there're times I felt sad when I see my friends who are so much younger than me wearing them!! Softly murmuring, I said to myself, " Why can't I have one? Why can't I? Why , why?? Why not?" Those thoughts goes on and on ......

Thank God that yesterday's ones were FREE of charge!!! I almost gave up trying to wear them as it hurts when I'm trying to open my eyes as big as possible to get it in... Well, after half an hour... it finally got into my eyes... I was so happy!!!! It's so unpredicatable!

When I got home, I removed those lenses and replace it with my spects again. Then, I started to file up my stuffs like what I did every semester.... so many papers lying around on my table but not sure which is important and which is not.... *confused* Anyway, I didn't realized that I have so many notes and stuffs for only 2 reading subjects and a project course. Phew.. it's like me taking a tons of subjects for almost a year since there are tons of paper notes and etc. Weird, isn't it? Well, I spent for about 3-4 hours just to punch those holes on my papers just to get them into my files...........but my files aren't enough.... All is filled and too heavy to be filled up more.... they are 'super-saturated'. Now, I'm wondering when I could get some new files to be up on my shelves before the semester reopens again.

Forget it!

Why the majority of the college students are so free to hang out around with friends but not me??????? why? Haha, see... my favorite question is why and why and why..... I think as I grew more older, I'm more curious in so many things compared to when I'm in my high school. When the teacher said this is the answer, then that's it! No Whys.... But now, as I'm in college (entering my 3rd year as soon the semester starts next month), I'm more into questions like 'how's and 'why's" .... I'm so curious why the psychologists could find out certain variables pertaining to their research and sometimes I'm just not too sure how they go about researching it....

In my opinion, it's high time for me to grow up.......grow up in the sense to have the analytical skills and leadership skills! I can take up my whole life grumbling... but is that what I want in life? As I introspect my life, I realized this is not what I want! What I want is to complete my degree, get that certificate and move on with the career as a crisis counselor while doing my part time masters degree and become a counseling and clinical psychologist thereafter. What a long way to go... Will my dreams succeed? God is in control of that! That is what I believe. My aunt always say, "Why are you dreaming so big?" Well, what I know is that I'm serving a BIG God, hence, my dreams can be BIG too!!! This is what I learnt from one of the Sunday's sermons. With God, everything is possible!!

Well, there are times in my life whereby my grandma or anyone in my family will say, "You don't have to aim so high for your results/ grades. Just aim for a pass, it's enough." For me, if I want to aim, of course I will rather aim for an A... not a B or a C or a Pass.... As according to researchers, if a student aims for a pass, their results will fall short from what they have aimed, hence , they will receive a F grade. If I would aim for an A, I might get a B or a C.... better than a F grade while aiming just a pass!!! This could be due to the efforts those students have put in for their exams and etc.

So, guys.... if you're aiming for something, AIM FOR THE STARS- AIM HIGH!! So, you could shoot the nearest target!!! Not sure how true it is for you people, but it's TRUE for me!! Try it out!!!! It's never too late to try! As the saying goes, "NEVER TRY , NEVER KNOW".
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emiko shinning brightly at 3:22 PM

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